How do I prevent my son from lying and make him honest Important steps to take

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How do I prevent my son from lying and make him honest? This may be one of the most important things that parents need to know, especially when it comes to telling the truth, because the way to lie is the easiest way to avoid problems and shocks, but children do not realize that it is the beginning of the way of deviation, and they do not realize that it is the way to deviate. There is no solid ground to stand on and you will lose the respect of everyone around you, and this is something that must be cultivated in children from a young age.

Why do children lie? 

Before getting to know how to prevent my son from lying and make him honest, we must know why children lie? Is this something that only happens with my children? Or is it a phenomenon that occurs continuously and with a lack of awareness, the matter increases and becomes a habit that is difficult to get rid of, and these are the most important points that psychologists have reached about why children lie:

fear of punishment

The first reason comes unchallenged, which is the fear of punishment, as most parents believe that proper education is based on orders, threats and prohibitions, without looking at other matters.

Which makes the relationship with the child not based on dialogue and discussion, and does not respect the child’s freedom and the extent of his rights to choose, as we resort to punishing the child without looking at explaining what harm this matter to him or why he has resorted to doing this matter.

For this we must know that the primary role of fathers is to clarify, inform and protect, and not, as some believe, that it is limited to imposition, prevention and coercion.

This is what drives children to fear and then lies to escape this punishment, but whoever follows the correct method of education builds in the child the importance of telling the truth.

Not knowing the characteristics of the age groups

Judging the child as a liar comes quickly from the parents without looking at the age stage in which the child is.

Because children from the age of two to seven years are distinguished by having a wide imagination, inventing many fairy tales and the child is the hero in this story.

While the older age group and the one that follows it from 7-12 years old, they tend to hide the truth because they want to prove their intelligence.

Therefore, parents should not judge the child as a liar quickly until after looking at the characteristics of the age stage of their child, and they should not care if they lie to them or interact with these fantasies, because punishment will be born with the idea that lying is a beautiful thing that makes him escape punishment. .

Criticism and inconsistency

Many parents resort to using negative vocabulary with their children, which leads to the destruction of the child’s psyche, and this creates the idea that they are useless and bad people, and this leads them to think about things that distract them until they get out of this psychological distress.

Which motivates him to lie to his family to practice everything that makes him forget his pain, so those who raise children must be trained to use the kindest expressions.

Jealousy among children

Jealousy pushes children to do things that all attract attention from the other child, even if these things are negative, and lying is one of these ways, even if in return he receives bad treatment and punishment as a result of lying.

Parents lie in front of children

Some parents lie in front of their children, or they are the ones who teach them to lie in small matters such as answering the phone or other other matters in which parents escape from confronting telling the truth and leave the children to take over the task of lying, from which the child learns this trick that does not cause him any problems.

Individual reasons for lying about children 

There is another group of reasons for lying in children, which are:

  • Some children lie because it gives them a sense of excitement, and that’s when they make others believe the wrong words and actions.
  • Lying may be the result of embarrassment, and when the child is exposed to an embarrassing stop, he resorts to lying to get out of this situation.
  • There are children who lie in order to convince others of their point of view.
  • Some children are more likely to lie than others, including children with ADHD, because they have impulsive behaviors, which makes them more likely to lie.

How do I prevent my son from lying and make him honest?

You must look at all the characteristics of your child and deal with all the problems that you face patiently so that you can find appropriate solutions that will lead you to building a healthy relationship with your child and this should be at the top of your priority list and we will provide you with the best ideas you need to answer your question about How do I prevent my son from lying and make him honest:

Focus on the positive

Parents are obligated to deal with children in a positive way, and this comes when they separate the action from the subject, that is, when the child lies. Do not direct critical speech to the child, but put your words on this bad trait.

In return, give your child all the love he needs and support him with all the meanings of encouragement, but in the event that this act is repeated again, in this case he must bear the result of his action and be prevented from something beloved that he intended to do, or a game or any of these methods, while making sure to clarify the reason.

praise honesty

Parents should use phrases that praise honesty and explain its importance, the extent of its cycle, and why God has honored the honest and prepared for them a place in heaven.

As well as clarifying the value of honesty, and confirming the idea using purposeful stories, and the length of the story varies according to the age of the child.

In addition to encouraging the child whenever you see him telling the truth and not lying, it is one of the things that helps build and consolidate the importance of honesty, while clarifying why lying is one of the bad qualities that should be avoided.

Parents are role models for children

The child learns from the behaviors and actions that he sees from the parents, so care must be taken to set a good example for your children, and to be honest, and you must abide by your promises with them so that they learn the value of promises and that you are honest in their implementation.

Containment and tenderness

Remember when you were young what you felt, that is why you should put yourself in the shoes of your children, remember the feelings and feel them.

Also, care must be taken to find honesty in the voice that you hear inside you, that is, do not deny what you feel. The message behind this lie may be that they need to be contained and feel warmth and tenderness.

Safety

It is strictly forbidden for parents to deal with children harshly by using negative words or permanent violence, beating and threatening for all their negative behaviors. Rather, you must follow a culture of dialogue with them, as it is important to explain to them and clarify the negatives and positives of the matter.

Respect their freedom comes in the same order of importance, as it is what enhances the value of their responsibility, helps them bear the consequences of their actions, and you must make them see in you a fortress and a safe haven for them.

They feel permanent comfort and reassurance when talking to you, and not afraid even about the mistakes they have made, and this results from their confidence in your acceptance, understanding and containment of the subject they are talking about, and in your ability to handle this matter calmly and wisely.

Recognize age characteristics

It is the point that affected the reasons for lying in children, because it may be the result of the child’s presence at the age in which the child creates events and stories.

It is necessary to act wisely at this stage and try to develop this matter in its rightful place and not to punish the child for these stories in any way, so that the subject does not affect him negatively.

How can I prevent my son from lying and make him honest? We have provided the answer to this important topic, which all parents are exposed to, because lying is one of the things that may arise with the child and learn it in order to defend himself and escape and not face reality.

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